No, I am not going crazy, I don’t believe anyone has been replaced by a robot.  I do believe sometimes that I could be though.

Some days, good days, and/or days spent with close friends, I am all there.  I am laughing, and telling jokes and I am picking up on all the humor in the situation.  Simply put, I am 100% on the ball.  This isn’t most days.

Most days I sit listening to other people speak.  I wait, I hear someone say something I have an interest in, or a related story.  I wait for a long enough pause and I tell it. Simply put it is robotic in nature.  Flag key words, insert comment/anecdote now.  If pause continues after, make additional comment.

Sometimes I look and I wonder if anyone really had any interest in what I said, especially when I am at work.  I don’t really know these people, I don’t really want to talk to them, I rather read my book.  I do however want a job here after I graduate, and I have been told people hire people they like, and who are social.  So basically I am attempting to be social, and I wonder how much of what I say comes off as normal, how much is a little weird, or if they can tell I have them on robot auto-response.

Working summer jobs, bad summer jobs, taking caps off.  I took caps off, mention my capping experience.  Continue with weird math issue coworker had at that job.  Getting strange look, shut up and listen to other persons story. Did I say something wrong?

As I said, there are days I am there, I am just talking and laughing, and enjoying myself.  But most days social interaction is like it is above, a thought out process which is more an obligation than an actual desire to interact.  One thing I was glad for, was that is was Friday, and today I can sit at home in my PJ’s and read to my hearts content.


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