I have been on edge all day. Ever since i woke up at 6 am with a few numb fingers panicking. I realized after I was laying on those two fingers, and I have lines on my hand. From the pj pants imprint on my hand. Oh and I woke up at 2:30 am with a tension headache, which was just the start of a wonderful day.
Then I took my cat to the vet, and I had to wait 25 minutes for the vet to show up. It was nerve wracking, and irritated the hell out of me. At this point I was still ok.
My parents showed up an hour late and complained about the fact I didn’t clean the house enough. I put in a really good effort into cleaning the house. But still I was ok. Then I started thinking about the dinner I had to go to tomorrow, and that’s when I went over that edge. Nose has been running, bathroom every ten minutes, cold, shaking, funny feelings, random tingling. Basically completely losing it. I need to come home first to ditch my stuff, what time do I go back, what if I am late, are my business cards spelled wrong, my pants need to be hemmed. Ironically only one leg of my pants needs to be hemmed, did I put them on wrong. I didn’t by the way, my mother checked and one leg of the pants is legit 1.5 inches longer than the other. I had to get my bangs cut, what earrings am I gonna wear. That was 2 hours ago and though the shaking and nose running has stopped the rest is going strong. When I think about it intensely, as I am now, I feel almost dissociated from myself, and my stomach is making funny noises, and now I have gas. I tried to calm down with a TV show, but its only been minor successful. I am dreading the idea of going to bed, because in bed, there are no distractions.And getting to sleep is going to be pur hell